Thursday, December 03, 2009

A Tale Of A Man Named Joe

It was a Tuesday afternoon the first time I met Joe.  The full white beard and hair with thin gold framed eyeglasses gave him a thin Santa Claus look that him appear older than his 61 years.  He was a helicopter pilot during Vietnam and the war scene had a profound affect.  At some point he had been declare ‘insane’ and had received full medical benefits.  Anyone who knew him though would just tell you he was interesting, unique or odd. 
He ran a small engine repair shop from his garage and lived next door in a 24 foot diameter geodesic home he built single handed.  The home was small but the craftsman ship and details were of a patient quality. I remember a stone fireplace centered in the house extending all the way to the peak of the dome, each of the shists, quartz and granite rocks were found nearby.  The bathroom on the second floor loft had a half moon cut in the saloon style door
 It just happened to be 4 pm when I arrived on that summer day and it was time for ‘Oinky’s’ beer. Oinky was Joes 400 pound pet pig. Oinky loved beer.  From the pen, we walked 20 paces over to the shop.  As I was overlooking a riding lawn mower, Joe was talking away, back to me, about the repairs from the work the bench.  I didn’t think much of it.
 When he turned to face me again he was sparking up a rather large joint with a plumbers torch.  He got the ‘j’ cherried within 4 puffs then proceeded to place it into some device that resembled a light bulb.
 I looked at him curiously:

It don’t waste smoke this way’ Joe says ‘do ya want some?’
‘No thanks Joe, it’s a long way home for me, but go right ahead.”
‘Oh don’t worry about that, I will!’  laughing loudly.


Shortly thereafter a woman with a snowblower arrives.  Joe walks out to talk with her, learn the problem and get her phone number to call her when the job is done.  While I was waiting, Russ, who occasionally works in the shop told me a story about how one day he came into the shop to find that Joe had just eaten a bag of mushrooms and was now standing in front of the mirror with hair clippers.  He had just finished shaving the whole left side only of his head and beard.  Russ told me he kept it like that until the next day when the ‘shrooms had finally worn off. 
I haven’t see Joe in quite a while.  Recently I learned that he decided it was time to plan an end. One day he went out back, shot Oinky, then himself.

R.I.P. Joe.

Monday, November 30, 2009

On the Road

I pulled on to I-95 at 5:30am driving north.  The oranges, purples, pinks and blues started to brighten in the pre-dawn sky as the sun rose.  Near Benton, in a field on the right, four deer were feeding in a cut hayfield.  Their breath visible in the cold morning air. 

After nearly 4 hours I arrived at the job site and the task of removing gasoline contaminated soil began.  At 4 pm the sky was dark again, the work day done and 930 yards of soil had been removed.
Based on the number of service vehicles and trucks in the parking lot, my hotel choice was a popular one among others working in the same area.  At 5:15pm I was unpacked and it was time for a shit, shower and shave before heading out into the cold dark to track down some dinner in this small eastern Maine border town.
After a burger and some beers I returned to my room to check email and send notes back to the office. The free wi-fi signal offered by the hotel was weak so I found my self sitting near the door with the laptop propped up on the sink.  The bleak florescent lighting and asylum white walls, all reflecting in the sink mirror, cast a depressing aurora. 
I quickly finished my work and moved into bed;  5:30am would come fast, lucky for me the bedside alarm clock was already set for the right wake up time and tomorrow was Friday.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Maine: We'll Let You Smoke Pot, Just Don't be Gay

One result from the election this past Tuesday is that 53% of Mainers are homophoes. I think a lot of things about this:  it sends a sad message, people are so disturbed by the gay sex part of the issue that they are overlooking the intent, marriage is the proof of commitment that two people love each other. The people who were for overturning the law that out legislatures passed to legalize gay marriage are frightened. Afraid of what? I’m not sure...that their kids will be taught about gay marriage in school, who the fuck is taught about marriage in school?; i certainly was not, were you?
And there is another point, why do we have Legislatures making and passing (or not) laws, if every time one goes through, it gets kicked back to the citizens for a re-vote? We could save a ton of money and time in this State if we axed the whole legislature system and turned every decision to the citizens for voting...*whatever*.
This whole post could become rantish, boring and get TLDR so Ill shorten this up and come at this from another angle. I think we missed a good opportunity to increase sections of the economy. The wedding planners, cake makers, function halls, suit rentals, wedding dresses....all that money spent in/on weddings will never be spent....travel accommodations, all of it. I'd venture to say millions per year in this state. Bye Bye. Then you have the divorce lawyers....they would likely have more work too.  I'm gonna guess this marriage issue will be back.
Now, the other vote issue that came up is the 59% of Mainers supported the medical marijuana proposal to expand availability...basically to create dispensaries.  Hummm...we'll let you smoke pot, but just don't be gay.   What a world.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

October 27, 2009 Vblog




-Hi Ma

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Video Blog October 20, 2009

Well, when your on a roll...keep rolling.




Friday, October 16, 2009

October 16, 2006 VBlog

I've been kind of bored with blogging lately. My camera crapped out so I was losing the photographic inspirations that make blogging interesting.  Additionally, home time and work time has increased, especially with the onset of winter. I still got wood to move and attic insulation to lay out (today). So, since that I have the day off I thought I'd give something different a try.  Plus I want to add more things for my family to see and also leave behind some candid recordings to add to the original intent of this blog, journal.

My early morning vBlog for today:









-joe

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Gross Baby Story

This tale must be shared. It is not uncommon but must be documented for the purposes of this blog as that  I hope one day my son will discover these writings of mine and understand more of my life and his. No pictures please.

Early this morning as we were preparing for work.  The boy and I were in the kitchen.  He was naked from the waste down because mom asked me to leave his bottom bare to air out the undercarriage. I was getting milk from the refrigerator while the boy was pulling tea and spices from the cabinets.  I turned back to look at him and Im like 'When the fuck did the dog shit on the floo...aawwwh crap.

Yep. LG dropped lumber on the kitchen floor AND was standing in it. 

I picked him up to bring him to the changing table, just as a do...'doink'  -poo covered foot, meet Dads shirt. 

I clean up the bulk poo quickly and yell out from mom, who cant hear anything over the whine of the hair dryer. We scoot over to the bathroom for her to clean the shit from between his toes.

With my shirt removed I move right back into the kitchen to disposed of the soft log and manage this hazardous waste clean up. 

The End.  When is fathers day again? I'm asking for something good.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Summer Blow Outs


Two weeks ago my friend "Ranger" won a writing contest and 50 pounds of lobster as the prize. A kid friendly group celebration at Winslow Park in Freeport to consume said crustaceans was held. I think I had two bugs and picked though 4 extra bodies.

The this past weekend celebrates the the boys first journey around the sun. That was a quick year. The family gathered like it hasn't in many many years on Saturday. It was bigger than our wedding. Then on the following Sunday Grandpa-G said a local lobster man stopped by and dropped off some more lobsters at no charge. So on Sunday we cooked up 24 lobsters and 20 crabs...with only three eaters. I got through 6 and then shelled 15 into a bowl for lobster rolls and other recipes. Three full pounds of lobster meat. I ended up putting two pounds into the freezer. TWO POUNDS! The third pound will be used for the lobby rolls. Yumm!

I ended up bringing three lob's and 4 crabs over to the Ranger to share the wealth. Its gonna be a hella shellfish week.

I love Maine.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Little Boy Jew Come Blow Your Horn

I couldn't resist the post title. It fits too perfectly, and the number one rule to get your story read, is have a catchy title.
Sitting in the park today, soaking up the sun I watched as two men wearing some traditional style Jewish clothing were handing out free honey, blowing a shofar (ram's horn) and as I learned publicizing the coming new year -Rosh Hashana.
It turns out that Rabbi Akiva Herzfield of the Congregation Shaarey Tphiloh in Portland is inviting everyone to attend the free service at 4:30pm on Saturday the 19th. this year

"Now is the time to reach out and remind people of their Jewish roots, and to invite them to greet the New Year" -as the good Rabbi is quoted in the September 12, 2009 Portland Daily Sun.



Herzfield and 'David' were also handing out free 4-ounce jars of kosher honey while promoting their new year services.  The honey is made in Portland. The honey is very tasty and you can get more info and even purchase some at OVERLAND HONEY.com.